Life Lesson #170~ Where the Sea Meets the Sky

"See the line, where the sky meets the sea? It calls me and no one knows how far it goes." ~Moana

I was born exactly 44 years ago today. I was born the daughter of a southern gentleman, an All American, death from above, 82nd Airborne soldier and a shy, quiet, creative soul, musicaly inclined and exceptionally beautiful vision I call my mom. I was born in the middle of the night placed in the waiting arms of my parents and given my name, Christina Marie. It's meaning was personal. It's interpretation meaning follower of Christ, a child wished for. Indeed I was born an only child, but I bloomed and my roots grew strong because of this. My parents, a couple of dreamers, a pair of survivors and a family of two for years became a family of three with my birth. The life I have inherited from my mom and dad is one of unconditional love, faith and genuine happiness. Some may look at my life, reaching back to my humble beginnings and see a sheltered and protected little girl. And the truth is I was. I attended Christian schools, and was eventually home schooled. My body was attacked repeatedly by illness, even as it still is today. I found deep love inside our little family of three and an overwhelming acceptance of who I was and who I would never be. I was shown how to be brave, to be strong, to own my mistakes and to be kind above all. Much like Moana though, I was taught, " Sometimes the world seems against you. The journey may leave a scar but scars can heal and reveal just where you are."

I was born a child of adventure and imagination. I loved my little world, and it suited me quite well. I'd build snowmen as tall as towers in my mind when we lived in Germany. I created forts made of sheets strung across the living room and I explored castles and forests all across Europe. I enjoyed high tea with my dad and snuggling and listening to my mom sing, 'Baby Mine' as I fell asleep. I loved reading Wonder Woman just before bedtime and bellowing out anthems at the top of my lungs. As a teenager I modeled current fashion inside the mall shop's windows, snagged a few trophies in local talent competitions, brought home a crown or two competing in beauty pageants along the way and won a few awards for my poetry back in the day. But like my parents, I was also a dreamer, a girl of vision with a serious history of grace. Much like the spirit of Moana, I wanted to explore beyond the reefs, to voyage to places yet unseen. I dreamed of mornings chasing the waves, afternoons in libraries and museums and evenings dancing under the stars. I was shown how to fly, to accept my flaws by those who knew me best. I was taught there was nothing ordinary about who I was born to be and that my life, my story and my calling was significant, even if only in the eyes of God. I was raised be to an unspoken leader and yet never to apologize for the fire within my soul. Yes I longed to sing a different song than those around me. I knew I was different, born to be divergent, to beat a drum as original as I was. As with Moana's Song I understood, "The call isn't out there at all. It's inside me. It's like the tide. Always falling and rising."  Yes, I believe I knew long before I understood the lesson Moana teaches us, come what may, I already knew the way. Wherever life was going to take me, I was going to find my way by listening to my heart.

I may have been born a horse of different color, a totally different cup of tea, odd, weird, outside the box but I knew my heart, just as I know it now some 44 years after I was born. You see just as Isaiah 58:11 says, "Where God guides, He provides." He does. He has been guiding my footsteps all along, even before I was conceived. This life I lead now, is a reflection of His undying grace and love. See He has a plan for my life just as He has for yours. As with Moana's Gramma Talo, my Father is always with me. Remember what she says? "There is nowhere you can go that I won't be with you." I've found God is never far. When the waves are crashing all around me or the waters spilling over and overwhelming my boat, He is there. Psalms 107:29 assures me of this. "He calmed the storm to a whisper and stilled the waves." When I am at my weakest, scared and feeling like I've failed He's there, reminding me to put an end to the conversation of defeat going on inside my head. His grace allows me to stop allowing the nay sayers and any one's anger and bitterness to distract me from what He Himself has already called and told me to do. I am a child of God, a daughter of the King. I was born, chosen for this life for a reason, and with a purpose. I have traveled a long, long way past the reef, that's for sure. But I know who I am in Christ. I am Christina of the Dowling Clan. I am the daughter of dreamers, a soldier and a beauty. I have been given a place at the table, and a name to call my own. By God's grace my heart has been restored. I have no fear of what's to come. I am not defined by what has been taken from me. The truth of who I am is completely defined by the grace God has restored to my heart. I believe in the promise spoken over my life from the moment I was born, "Greater is He who lives inside me than he who lives in this world!" And this truth I have learned repeatedly. 

Now today, on this day, my birthday I proclaim the truth by Lessons Learned Life. "The older I get the more I understand that it's OK to live a life other's don't understand." So go, get in your boat, set sail beyond the island that holds you. I have to come to realize that this life is not for the whims of others but for the great adventures your soul calls you to. Life will never be easy and it may indeed be difficult,  but the life you have been given is the one God has called you to. Embrace it, accept who you are and the calling, on your life past the reef. Don't let the rejection of others outweigh that. "In Christ you have nothing to hide, nothing to prove, nothing to fear and nothing to lose." I trust in Jesus. He is my protector, my refuge. There is nothing He can't provide for me. Neither is there one person who can take from me what He has given. Remember this, Moana, teaches us a valuable lesson if we will only apply it. "The people you love will change you. The things you have learned will guide you. And nothing on earth can silence the quiet voice still inside you."

So I encourage you today, to paddle out, past the reef and see all God has waiting for you. I have. And I plan to continue my adventures, voyaging beyond  borders wanting to contain me. By His grace, I can see well past where the sea meets the sky. But as with Moana I have come to understand, after some  44 years of adventures, "there comes a day when you're gonna look around and realize happiness is where you are. And this is the truth of Life Lesson #170 ~ Where the Sea Meets the Sky. We must find ourselves, be ourselves, accept ourselves, embrace our calling and stop striving to live in the future or the past. By doing so we miss the present, the blessings of the here and now. Life doesn't issue do-overs. Truth is we have to enjoy the time we are given with those we have. And that's exactly what I plan to do this very day. I will enjoy this time I have with those I love. And, yes I will be thankful for this day. A day that marks one some 44 years ago to when I was born, placed into the arms of my parents, named Joshua and Micah's mom, chosen to love and be loved by the love of my life and called to be His, part of the greatest story I know. Who could have imagined, I'd be a vessel of the King of Kings? That through me His love would tell a story, one that includes me as His heir, a Daughter of the King? My advice to you is this, listen to your calling, follow your heart, be content in what you have and find peace where God leads you. This is how you truly find who you were meant to be, and how far you are meant to go.

"See the line where the sky meets the sea? It calls me and no one knows how far it goes. If the wind in my sail on the sea stays behind me one day I'll know, how far I'll go."  ~Moana

~Christina