Waiting...
I am up late tonight. I cannot sleep. Our home is tense as we wait for the news... good or bad. Johnny is scared, though he will not admit it. The boys sleep is restless and still we wait. Though it has only been six days it feels like I have been waiting for an eternity already. Every time the phone rings, either the home or cell, I jump. Is this the call? What will she say? How will I react? Will I jump up and down with good news or be shaken with the bad? Who do I call first? What do I say? Better yet how do I say it? I truly do not know how I will respond yet though I have tried to play the scene out in my mind a thousand times over. Still, good or bad an answer is most welcome right now. The knowing of what is ahead, to be able to wrap my head around what is to come or is not to come will be a welcome relief. The heaviness of this waiting is almost unbearably painful as it is eerie. I feel as if I am just waiting here in the shadows watching the storm roll in. The only way I can ...