Brave Heart, Brave Soul. She who is brave is free.

Well, getting a new pair of whatever you prefer to call them is not all it us cracked up to be, let me tell you! Oh my, what was I ever thinking? Oh wait, I wasn't thinking, it was the fun loving cancer that decided to take away my breasts. So here I am 5 days later looking somewhat between the Bride of Frankenstien and Sally from the Nightmare Before Christmas and feeling as if a train just hit me going 200 miles per hour at the same time a cement truck poured its entire barrel over top of me and sped off! There is a lot in there to expand upon ... later when I have actual full use of my upper body. But for now I will just leave it at that. As for how I am holding up? I am doing my best. I am getting past the 'upfront costs' of both the plastic surgeon and the medical facility and the idea of a nipple tattoo. Truthfully, I am just plain tired and in pain but I am still up and doing what I can. I guess I am finally admitting that my body just isn't able to bounce back

Christina Is FINALLY Saying Good-bye to Her Lop Sided Boobs ! The day has finally arrived! This Friday, September 21, 2007 at 11:30 AM I will go under the knife hopefully for close to the last time. I will be in the OR for 3 1/2 hours which will put me back out around 3 PM and then I will go to the Recovery Room for about 2 hours. I have a new plastic surgeon, and he is on the ball. By the Grace of Heaven our insurance is working with us, and even though the cost is a bit more than we really have right now and I have had to put payment down already, it is manageable in the long run. So here I go, into surgery 7. Wow! That just amazes me really. To think I have gone under that many times in 20 months and that I will finally be asclose to whole as I will ever be is breath taking. I don't really know what to think about it all actually. One part of me is thinking to myself, "no biggie, it's just another surgery" and then the other part of me is screaming out loud,

I was blessed this weekend by having the opportunity to speak for many young woman facing breast cancer during a live news interview. I was beside myself and a nervous wreck, but the truth is that I had my wonderful husband and my closest friend there with me. True I could really see the affects of this cancer on my face, but I was sitting there, alive and able to speak for those that can't. So this morning in the midst of all that is happening with my dad and even with all these new, costly tests I am being put through, I offer this part of my inner thoughts to you, my friends. I wrote this some time back on a really bad day. In my day to day struggle, and as I watch others struggle through their own battle with this beast, I know that I speak not only for myself, but for many others in how CANCER rips away at your spirit some days. This entry is for all CANCER SURVIVORS. I really feel it hits the nail right on the head in respect to even the strongest survivors along the Journey

Living on the Island of Misfits Most definitely there are times when living in the aftermath of breast cancer feels a lot like living on an Island of misfits. You really do understand that there is just something a little off, a bit different about you now. Still you want to believe if just for a moment, that even with your square peg you will fit into that round hole sitting in front of you. Point in case, my most recent moment off the island came last week in the hour I spent in a mall fitting room. Talk about feeling like a misfit as you try carrying in bra after bra, filling in only half of it and falling completely out of the other half of it! Talk about being a true mis-fit! Then there was the little problem of who was this person staring back at me from out of the other side of the mirror? I finally just began telling myself that I must simply be going blind. After all, this whole new me, well it simply wasn't me! I certainly didn't recognize this woman and the reflect