Life Lesson #467 ~ Lemons to Lemonade

                       

Sometimes we put up roadblocks, shutting down all the easy roads to us. I know I've been there a time or two myself. It’s easier to close ourselves off than deal with the noise and commotion around us. It’s not that we’re ignoring the havoc or don’t see the chaos. We simply need silence. I know when life hands me lemons I need to slow down and be still. But mostly I just need time to figure it all out. So, the barriers go up. I steal myself away until I’m ready to make lemonade. 

Truthfully, it takes time to get yourself right. To sort it all out and accept where you are. That’s the key though really. Accept then act. None of us should force things. It only leads to more upheaval. Nothing happens overnight. And the art of making a great pitcher of sweet lemony goodness starts out with a bunch of sour lemons.  

Hurt and pain don’t just wash away. Happiness just doesn’t show up and replace loss. Letting go takes time. Acceptance requires us to embrace the idea that things aren’t going to be what we want them to be. And if we’re being honest, moving forward demands we give up control. Lori Deschene nails it on the head. “Sometimes all you can do is accept there’s not much you can do. And sometimes all you can control is how well you let go of control.” 

So, how do we heal?  How do we accept what we can’t fix or change? How do we let go? How do we move and go on? What’s the next step? Well, it’s awareness. Knowing those lemons on the table aren’t going to turn themselves into lemonade on their own.  And that means work. Work means accepting. And accepting means being aware of ourselves and our part in whatever fiasco we’re wrapped up in.  

I like the way Brene Brown puts it. “I’m here to get it right, not be right.” Look, I am wrong a lot. I’m the queen of goof ups.. I’m not pure or spotless. I carry blame. I am human. You are human. Being so means we’re all flawed. We say things. Do things. Assume things. And all of those “things” unchecked lead to dissent, unforgiveness, hostility and yes, estrangement. Awareness says,” It’s not about us and them. It’s about you and me. “  

We all have gotta work through things. Nothing worth having comes easy. Family requires more than happy celebrations or reunions. It takes digging in the trenches together and duking it out occasionally. Life is not a bed of roses, and neither is family. See, happiness isn’t found, it’s made. Contentment requires work and so does love. Real love anyway. Unconditional love for yourself, and others doesn’t just go up in smoke. Real memories don’t just fall off a tree and die. They do, however, dry up on the branch if they’re left unkept and untended. Just like friends and family.  

We’re all complicated. Our families and their journeys aren’t always parallel.  The labyrinth home isn’t easy by any means. It’s complex and cumbersome but never impossible. We choose to love despite imperfections or missteps. Everything we do in life is a choice. Just like deciding to make lemonade out of lemons is. All it takes is work and awareness. Because if we truly love, unconditionally, without expectations, there  comes a time we can be brave enough to open the roads again and start over. And then maybe, just maybe if given a chance, we can start turning those lemons into lemonade. 

~Merida Grace