Brave Heart, Brave Soul. She who is brave is free.

  There are times in life when nothing goes right. I mean absolutely nothing! For one reason or another everything is out of sync. We might know why, or none of it makes sense at all.  Confusion usually follows. Sadness and depression typically creep in at some point. Anxiety is a given and anger eventually makes its rounds too. So, what comes next? How do we turn things right side up once they’ve flipped upside down?  I have no idea, to be perfectly honest with you.. There’s no magic answer or trick to it. Sometimes you’ve just gotta go through hell and keep going till you reach the other side. It’s not a simple answer. It's simply the truth.   Why do I say this? Well, because I’ve spent a lot of time there myself recently. Let me just say it now, it's not fun. Nothing about being out of sync is amusing or a beer and skittles moment. It's downright miserable and uncomfortable really. When life gets all knotted up and the worms are out of the can, things can get...

  An Open Letter To My Son ~ I’m not sure where life took a wrong turn. But it did 2 and a half years ago. I’d love to tell you I understand everything. But I don’t. Not because I’m blind to my own faults. I know I have plenty of them. I’m mistaken often. I make the wrong choice, say the wrong thing and embarrass myself a lot. But what I’m not, is cold, without emotion, unfeeling or unapologetic. What I am is truly and deeply sorry for everything. I’m sorry for your pain and anger. I’m sorry for the damage done to our family and the rift between you and your brother. I’m truly distressed you’re separated from your Nana and Paw Paw. And I’m deeply remorseful that you've ever felt rejected. You are my son, and nothing can or will ever change that.  I hear your resentment and I deeply feel your hate. And it breaks my heart. However I’ve contributed to this injury, I’m sorry. I want to understand and hear you, to acknowledge and recognize your hurt. To face what it is I’ve do...

  I’m an optimist. Always have been, and always will be. It’s just who I am. I like to see the good in people and situations. I try to look past the negative. Not that I don't have moments of doubt and skepticism or hesitation. I do. I’m a realist too. I understand that not everything is going to come up roses. However, just because I have moments of confusion or uncertainty doesn’t mean I lose hope. I always have hope.  Some folks ask how I keep a smile on my face, especially when I’m at my lowest. I’ll be real with you here. I may be an optimist, but I’ve learned how to hide my pain and smile through it. Sometimes it’s easier to smile rather than explain. Chronic illness has taken a lot from me. Especially in the past 3 years. Surgeries, loss and grief have taken their toll. Estrangement has broken me. And yes, I feel every pin and needle prick drawing more and more energy from me every day. Still, I smile. Why? Because I have hope that whatever the outcome, I’ll find peace ...