Life Lesson #487~ Time

My dad turned 80 in July. I didn’t really grasp his age until the moment we all shouted “surprise” ! I understood 80 was coming, I had been planning his party for 6 months. But knowing and processing are two different things. My dad’s my hero. He’s kind and caring, forgiving and generous, compassionate, loving and forgiving. Plus he always has a bit of mischief in his eyes along with a contagious laugh hiding behind his smile. My dad’s humor is wicked and his stories, well, they’re hysterical. My dad can be humble and stubborn at the same time. Don’t get me wrong. He’s as human as they come. Dad gets grumpy sometimes, just like and gets stuck in his ways once and awhile. He’s not perfect, but he’s a good, honest man. There isn’t anything he wouldn’t sacrifice for his family. 

When I was little, time didn’t seem like a foe. I was a child. In my little mind I had no doubt my dad would always catch me. But time waits for no one. So, when 80 came and went I pretty much tripped over my own feet. Reality hit me like a wrecking ball. Not only am I getting older, my dad is too. As difficult as it is for me to comprehend, I'm sure it’s harder for him to believe his daughter is closer to being a grandmother and grandson's fathers.  I’ve asked myself dozens of times, “where has the time gone?” It feels like yesterday I was on his shoulders or the boys bouncing on his knees..

Looking back, I appreciate my dad more than ever. I never meant to take my time with him for granted. It just never occurred to me he would grow old or ever leave me. He’s my dad.  I love him with all my heart. He’s always been full of pep and laughter; trekking through Magic Kingdom and Epcot with two toddlers in tow. I see him slowing down but I can tell you  his humor is still very much intact. And yes, as if you have to ask, he still wears his favorite Indiana Jones hat most days. The difference now is, he’s completely gray, slightly more wrinkled, tired a little more often and his hands are a bit more shaky. 

This last summer I realized how fragile life is and the way it passes us by when we’re not paying attention. As we get older we wake up. Reality sets in. Guess what? Time begins to shift. We get older and change and our kids now don’t understand us either. We’re set in our ways, grumpy and tired. Bedtime and dinner come earlier. Now that we’ve been pushed over the hill, we let go of expectations and our younger sense of wisdom. Logic isn’t what we thought it was. As for all that common sense we thought we had, when the rose colored glasses fall off around 50, you understand it doesn’t matter if we agree on everything or not. Why? Because time is a thief. The more we waist, the less we have.

 All I want now is to enjoy this time with my dad and to be here right now with my parents. I don't want anything to go unspoken or a goodnight forgotten.  At 40 I fussed about calling my parents every night. I was a grown up after all. Now, at 51, I wouldn’t dare let a night go by without hearing my mom and dad’s voices on the line or saying, “ I love you.”

Time… is the real takeaway here. You can’t slow it down or pause it.. Lord knows I wish I could. My advice? Be in the moment. Breathe it is. Embrace it. Don’t take it for granted. Walk with it instead and be mindful of the minutes before they pass you by.

~ Merida Grace