Life Lesson #452 ~Life in Chaos

  

“A woman in harmony with her spirit is like a river flowing. She goes where she will without pretense... and arrives at her destination prepared to be herself and only herself.” ~ Maya Angelou 

 

Let’s talk about Mayhem, Havoc and Bedlam, shall we? And how about the fourth sister, we call Chaos. Take a look around right now. Our world is totally and completely upside down. Chaotic right? Who knew toilet paper would be a commodity? Or birthday parties would become caravans?  I mean 2019 would’ve had you arrested for wearing a mask inside a bank or grocery store, right? But hey, this is 2020 ya’ll. Don’t worry, now it’s a legit thing. What about canceled vacations or the phrase, “you’re on mute”? Come on, let's be blunt, this new norm isn’t really normal at all. Seriously, who’s gonna forget a record breaking 30 hurricanes in one season or being quarantined? And by all means let's not brush off the Murder Hornets or Zoom bombings. Oh, and just in case you’ve been under a rock somewhere, the word remote doesn’t have anything to do with your TV anymore. Social distancing is the new golden rule, unemployment is a bona fide, honest to goodness, no pun about it, real thing for most Americans. And as for the lines at food banks stretching for miles? It’s unprecedented. 

 

Can’t sugar coat it, Chaos has the stage. She’s hell bent on running the show too. As for mercy? Don’t count on it. She’s definitely pulling the strings and without grace or compassion to boot. Chaos has absolutely stormed 2020 and taken control of everything we once thought we had jurisdiction over. Like it or not Buttercup, she’s calling the shots and it’s not pretty. Chaos, well she’s a maelstrom of a shadow; lurking, attacking and totally relentless in both pursuits. I can't imagine anyone disagrees she’s had us locked up and down for most of this year. And if you’re keeping score, Chaos certainly saw 2020 coming long before hijacking the party.  

 

Personally, I’m over 2020. Heck, I'm done with Chaos too. She’s been trying to get a hold of my purse strings for years now. And at times done a pretty good job of ruling the roost. In spite of her though, I’ve learned to dance in the rain, clumsily, but on my feet all the same. I’m certainly not likely to win a dance off, not anytime soon anyway. But as they say, life is madness so be sure you learn to dance with Chaos. So indeed, I have. And no, I’m not some battle savvy warrior or unmatched in battle. I’ve fallen off my horse plenty of times. Chaos has stood over me cackling like a wild hyena. Probably splitting her sides a few times too is my guess. And believe me she’s left plenty of scars. I’ve hit the ground hard, had my heart broken, spirit crushed, body racked with wild and terrible pain but as Agatha Christi puts it, “I know quite certainly that just to be alive is a grand thing.”   

 

Let me tell you what I know about Chaos...she doesn’t go down easy and she never comes to the table quietly, that’s for sure. To put it mildly, she’s a glutton for attention. Chaos comes on the scene in an uproar, filling the room with disorder, turmoil and madness. She’s a three-ring-circus and we all know it. There’s no denying Chaos is all around us. She flows from deep within, circling the wagons, gurgling and spitting up pea soup, pouring out and filling in every empty space available in each and every direction she can. But Chaos, despite her bad reputation, isn't all bad, all the time. I know, I said it. I didn’t call her the villain, Yep, she’s not my ally, but she’s not without her genius too. She sure shakes things up, doesn’t she? But sometimes she’s exactly what we need. So yes, Chaos is a necessary and even essential guest from time to time, even if we gotta agree to disagree with her methods. 

 

I don’t know the last time Chaos was readily and freely invited to the party. She doesn’t usually make the list but yet she’s the usual suspect when things go wrong, isn’t she? Let’s be honest, as a rule when Chaos shows up unexpectedly, all hell breaks loose. Now I know traditionally, Chaos is the enemy. And I’m not going to debate, she's a lawless mess most of the time. Look, she’s a mare’s nest. However, Chaos with all her commotion and disruption will often open our eyes to the broader, bigger picture we’ve been missing. You know, fill in the missing pieces. Truth be told, without Chaos, life would be predictable and rather boring in fact. We need Chaos. She teaches us important life lessons, constantly reminding us to appreciate our bough within the great tree of life. I like how Dave Hedges states it. “Life has a funny way of teaching us. It will create a deep sadness, so we know how to understand happiness. It will create chaos in our lives so that way we appreciate the peaceful times, and it will take those we love from us so that we will truly understand what their presence meant to us.” 

 

Chaos is the spice of life, like it or not. She teaches us to value life, to take chances, to laugh in spite of the pain and take the good with the bad. Through her eyes we can see the most precious of all lessons.... life is too short to be unhappy. Chaos if we’re paying attention will show us how to forgive, to smile through the frenzy and learn from our mistakes. Chaos, she reminds us life goes on even when we’re sad.  

 

In all my 47 years on this earth, I’ve battled Chaos and her sisters more often than I can count. She’s plagued me, scratched at my heels, tripped me up and stolen the very air I breathe. Still, I say to her, bring it on. Oh, believe me, she’ll give it her best shot, as she always does. After all, A tree does not fall with the first blow. (Icelandic Proverb) Sure Chaos has left me a bit bruised, I’m black and blue all over in fact but I’m still here. And so are you. Yep, 2020 is a complete dud, and not one of us has been left untouched by her woe. Still, we’re fighting, pushing back, holding our ground and waking up each and every day ready to do it all over again. 

 

I can only share what I know. And it’s really that not much in the scheme of things honestly. More of a cliché, I guess, but it's still true, life is hard. Like you, I’ve known suffering and adversity and I’ve completely lost myself in misery. I’ve held my breath, said goodbye and felt loss. Chaos has made me a warrior and I’m grateful for the life lessons she’s routinely prescribed without a license. Long before any of us heard of Covid or sourdough trended, Gandhi got it right. “Strength does not come from capacity. It comes from an indomitable will.” So just remember... even when life is in chaos, stay resilient, be yourself and stay in harmony with your spirit despite the turmoil. We will rise and 2020 will pass, as will 2021. Eventually the world will turn right side up again. And as for Chaos? Don’t worry and definitely don’t sweat it. She’ll be back, as she gets the chance. 

 

“She fell. She crashed. She broke. She cried. She crawled. She hurt. She surrendered and then...she rose again.” ~ Nausicaa Twila 

 

~Merida Grace